Tuesday, May 24, 2011

7 Days to My Goal! I am SO Excited I Could Pee! Literally, I NEED TO PEE!

Seven.days.left.

Not until the end of the world, people, until the end of my standing challenge.

I don't know if anyone cares anymore but, SEVEN.DAYS.LEFT!

I must say that I am consistently standing 5-6 hours before even thinking about sitting! Yesterday the only time I sat was when I had to drive! My feet and legs don't hurt anymore, except a tiny bit at the very end of the day...I am pretty shocked y'all, that I was able to do this. And I am certain I will not go back to sitting more than 3 hours a day. I have no reason to! My bestie from HS sent me this link on the "optional" standing desk. I think someone should build this for me. Yes, yes I do.

Buuuuuuuut as you know, however, the standing did not yield any weight loss; every Monday I checked my weight and measurements and nothing changed, in fact it got WORSE when Aunt Flo visited. So, if I have gained any health benefits, I have not seen them on the scale or measuring tape. And as I told you, this Monday I would start a new eating plan. And I did.

Because psh. I am not doing this challenge for my health...I am doing this to fit into my swimsuit in about 2 weeks! I live in a place with a community pool teeming with college girls and two children with marginal-swimming skills who want to live at the pool. HELLLOOOOO CAN YOU SAY FOR THE FRICKIN FRACK?

So this new diet eating plan I am using is from a book by Dr. Mike Moreno called The 17 Day Diet. I know. Sounds like a fad. But here's the thing people, if it's written out for me, in big black bold letters (which it is, and he's quite funny I must say!) I can do it. If I am left to my own devices, I will continue to eat chocolate cake for breakfast, even though I know better. And plus I have a good friend who is doing the plan and she has achieved awesome results...she is even blogging about it from time to time. Check it out.

Also, you can read a review HERE and check out his website HERE but, this is my one-word take on this plan...here we go:

Thisdietplanmakesyousufferemmensilyfor17dayseatingeggsandyogurtandthenafterthatotherphasescomethatletyoueatmoreandmorefooduntilattheendyouhaveanewwayofeatingthatallowsyoutomaintainyourawesomeweightlossANDeatwhatyouwant!

WHEW!

I started on Monday and, though I KNOW it's water weight at this point, ( I am on the 1st cycle, day 3 of 17 on Accelerate) 3.8 pounds has disappeared from the scale...

I don't care if it's water-weight, extra hair, skin cells, or hot air.

I LOST 3.8 POUNDS ALREADY PEOPLE!!!

FLIPPIN' FLIPPIN' HAPPY DANCE!

What can I say, I am a sucker for instant results...

But seriously, I have faith in the program because I like the foods involved later in the plan, exercise is not over-demanding, and his final eating plan is do DOABLE! And if you gain weight, you just start back at cycle one!

So that is all I am gonna say about that because he's not paying me or anything. Psh.

Except I'll say more. I kinda feel like I am on Survivor right now. But I don't have to eat bugs, and I am not being eaten by bugs, nor am I being forced to sleep next to a hairy smelly guy just to keep warm.

Did you know there is a Survivor Diet? Sheesh.

I mean, I am eating less, though more often and waaaaaaaaaay healthy. I am eating salad. Blech. And drinking water. DOUBLE BLECH!

Yesterday, I went grocery shopping. I got all these vegetables that were in the book, like a good girl, and then I spent HOURS cleaning them and prepping them and cutting them and assembling them and cooking chicken vegetable soup! I tell you, I nearly had a nervous breakdown! I was tired and starving, but I had to make this stupid super salad in order to eat! I kept telling myself, "there is only one way to eat an elephant..." and suddenly, I WANTED TO EAT AN ELEPHANT!

And here is my stupid super salad:


And I tell you, after eating basically eggs, yogurt and fish for two days, this salad, topped with raspberry vinaigrette, was the best fricken' thing I had eaten in what seemed like YEARS!

Today, for the 3rd day's lunch, I made home-made chicken soup, sans noodles, according to his specifications. Except I made my own soup. Here is the recipe...you'll love it for reals:

-Rotisserie chicken, lemon or herb
-Pot of Water
-4 large carrots
-6 stalks of celery
-5 to 6 cloves of fresh garlic, cut into halves
- Bottom portion of 2 leeks
-Bunch of fresh cilantro (optional)
-2 bay leaves
-TBS of dried sweet basil
-1/2 of a fresh lemon
-Salt and pepper to taste
-Season salt to taste
-Cayenne pepper (optional)

So you just tear off the chicken in big chunks and set in the fridge while you boil the entire chicken carcass in a pot of water. Bring to a boil and then reduce to simmer for about 30-45 min. Remove the carcass and then add your chicken and veggies, which are cut into big chunks. (I chop the leeks into big wheels because they will basically disintegrate.) Then add your 1/2 lemon, cilantro (cut up), and bring to a boil and then back down to simmer. Add the sweet basil and bay leaves and simmer for 30 minutes. Stir and then season to taste.

Everyone knows not to eat the Bay leaf right? Right.

I tell you. This is the best chicken soup EVER. Yes it is. Don't argue. I am sure your grandmother is nice and all but...mine is better. In fact here is it. You know you want some.


So, with the standing, and being on my way to better eating habits, I truly hope I am making strong and lasting lifestyle changes.

Except I hate water.

Here's why...

Water tastes bad. And actually I have to drink it warm with lemon, or in the form of club soda, to even choke down one glass. I am drinking about 4 glasses a day right now, not counting my coffee or tea, and I feel like I am downing an Olympic-sized swimming pool. And maybe you all don't know this, but there is NO REAL SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE that we MUST drink 8 glasses of water a day. That's right water drinkers. You're gonna have to accept this fact.

Case in point...

I am peeing like Niagara Falls.

Is that natural? Really? I mean, should I be racing to the toilet 8 times a day, spraying urine like a fireman's hose? Should I suffer through the night with a full bladder? Because see, my body doesn't wake me up if my bladder is about to burst. Nooooo. It just concocts NIGHTMARES in which I am running around looking for a bathroom, only to find a toilet sitting out in a public square with people everywhere, or toilets with feces all over them or totally clogged or something gross and terrible like that. Thank the LORD I have not found a clean, private, usable toilet yet...

I do not enjoy these recurring nightmares.

And there you go people, Day 23 half-way over. Is anyone still following this? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

If so, I leave you with this, a little Richard Simmons, Disco-style, to keep you motivated. Man, I hope the videos I post aren't the reason people aren't reading. Anyway you one person, enjoy.





6 comments:

Dee Crowe said...

I would eat that salad...oh yes I would. It is interesting..I wish there was a winter help plan to keep a person on eating fresh fruits and veggies over the winter....it seems like, at least for me, as soon as the weather dips in temp, I'm into the potatoes and pot roast...but during the summer, I could eat a whole platter of fruits and veggies!
Anyway...go Kim! woot!

lostinsuburbiablog said...

Ack!! We are leading parallel diet lives. My mother just sent this to me.. thought you would appreciate it:

It's the shampoo I use in the shower!

When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body, and printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning, "For extra volume and body." No wonder I have been gaining weight!
Well, I got rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn dish soap instead. Its label reads, "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove."
Problem solved. I don't know why I didn't figure this out sooner.

Kearsie said...

Well, I am in the market for a good diet, er-eating plan.And I'm super conscious of how much I sit during the day.

So, you're clearly a good influence on me. And my innernets. So. Feel good about that.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

I gotta tell you that I'm impressed. I don't think I could have stood for that long! :)

SierraMac said...

Okay, that's weird. I was getting online to search for a yummy soup recipe (not too hard, good for the crock pot) that I can take to school (work) tomorrow, and there it was, on your blog!

Also, I'm glad you were able to use that link today! :-)

Thirdly, I read a short article in Women's Health about standing. It was just a blurb and I can't find it on their website, but it was there! You're not crazy!!

:-) Sarah

w said...

i'd build you the desk. if you lived here.

i told you that salad looked good. except with soy sauce not vinaigrette.

the soup looks good.

i should buy you a barrel. you can send it careening down your niagara falls.

hahahahaaha. man. that was funny what i just said. but not lol funny. i've lost it. hence the no posts since forever thing.

i am not watching the video. the freeze frame scares me.

7 more days.

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